I used to only date.
I was a man of principles, in college, surrounded by great women. I'm a good-looking guy. I'm not good enough for a shaving ad, but I'm better than most. I had a nice selection of ladies to choose from.
My one rule was that it was serious dating and exclusive.
Due to this rule I missed out on so many great times with amazing girls. One ridiculously gorgeous girl was interested, but wanted an open relationship. I wrestled with it and turned it down. Wish I hadn't.
The saying (originating, I think, on How I Met Your Mother) that "guys regret the girls they didn't do, girls regret the guys they do" is very true. I regret the things/girls I didn't do far more than those I did and found unsatisfactory. At least with the latter I didn't have the nagging question of what might have been.
Choosing only serious relationships was due to an idea that if I wanted more but settled for less I'd be left unsatisfied, and therefore more miserable than before. This, in hindsight, was stupid.
So now, Craigslist types, I give you my new and improved Quesadilla Theory.
Back in college I spent a lot of time in our common room, chillin'. Having a voracious appetite and little money I was an unabashed mooch, and so when other house residents (it was a small house) came back with food I'd inevitably ask for some. When friends left the house to get food I'd ask them to get me some. It hardly ever happened, but once in a blue moon it payed off, at no expense to me.
As such what usually happened was someone would get food, eat most of it, and give the remainder to whatever mooches were in the common room. The best offering was part of a chicken quesadilla from this place down the block.
Whenever someone offered up one of those 'dillas I was on it. Even if I just ate. Even if I wasn't that hungry, having just mooched up some french fries. More often than not, though, I was indeed very hungry to the point of being ravenous.
During these ravenous moments you know what would've really hit the spot? A full chicken quesadilla - 8 slices of heavenly cheese chicken goodness. But just because that's what I wanted didn't mean I was going to turn down three slices given for free.
Girls are like quesadillas.
Or maybe relationships are.
The point is, I may want a serious relationship, a soulmate and the love of my life - if you think about it who wouldn't? - but if I have to settle for three slices of an open relationship or a fling or a one night stand, fine. It's better than no quesadilla at all. And, after all, isn't that what Christmas is really all about?