46; shower knobs

My computer decided that it hates me. This is not unusual, I suppose most of us have had to dig in and fight for our computers against nasty viruses. Sadly mine seems so screwed up that I'm probably going to have to take it to professionals for mental cleansing and spiritual guidance so that it can get back on track with life and start over by picking up the pieces.

Of course this means I'm using someone else's computer, which freaks me out. Granted this used to be my main computer, but I've not used it in about a year. The keyboard acts different. The mouse is strange. The monitor is wonky.

It's the same feeling you get when you drive a new car, or a car that's not yours. It seems vaguely similar to what you know, and yet, it just doesn't handle right.

I think a lot of people would be fine with life if they never had to change anything. They'd put stuff back exactly where it belongs so they could always find it, they'd always take the fastest route to work, there would be a comforting regimentation to it all.

Like showers. There is some magical place on your shower knob or dial that you set your morning shower to. Every day. Either you keep it set on that spot, or without thinking your hands turn the dial to the perfect coordinate and presto, perfect shower temperature.

Have you ever gone into the shower and found the knob has changed?

Your mind starts to race. Why has the knob changed? Who changed it? What happened last night that could have lead to this?

You vaguely recall that you were chatting up this girl at the bar, attractive, long black hair, and then...you awoke.

You go into your bedroom. There's an indent on the side of the bed next to you. You pluck a long black hair off the pillow. You look to the side table, and where there once was your wallet...

You call your friend Bob. Bob was with you at the bar, he'll know what happened.

"Bob, Bob! What happened at the bar last night? My shower knob!"

"Well, you were really smashed, out of your head, and you went over to the bar and tried chatting up this Rastafarian fellow with long black dreads. He was making fun of you so we took you home.

We put you in the shower, and turned it on cold and hot, then we put you to bed."

"But I found black hairs on my pillow! Someone slept next to me last night."

"You have a German Shepherd, remember?"

"Oh yeah. Here boy! Good dog. Well, my wallet is also missing. What happened to that?"

"You'll get that back when you deserve it. Goodbye."